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The sheer number of parenting books out there can be overwhelming, making it difficult to know which are the best books for first time moms, and which are a waste of time. To help you sort through the multitude, I’ve rounded up 10 books that I — and other moms I reached out to — found enlightening.
One thing to note: this article doesn’t include any of the how-to parenting books on swaddling, sleep training, or the day-to-day of caring for a newborn. Instead, this list of the best books for first-time moms focuses on reading that will help you, the mother, adjust to life as a new mom in a way that’s sustainable.
These books talk a lot about the mental load of parenting and how to talk to your partner about equitably sharing household responsibilities. They go over the struggles of returning to the office after maternity leave — or deciding to take a career pause. These books look at what being a mom in the 21st century is like, and in some cases turn conventional parenting advice on its head. They’ll make you feel seen when it comes to the physical and emotional changes you’re going through, whether you’re pregnant, have just given birth, or are nearing the end of your maternity leave and grappling with going back to work. I found these books inspiring as a first-time mom, and I hope you will too.
Without further ado, here are the 10 best books for first-time moms...
Skip Ahead: 10 Best Books For First Time Moms
1. Best Books For First-Time Moms: Expecting Better By Emily Oster
When economics professor Emily Oster became pregnant, she started analyzing the scientific data behind conventional pregnancy advice, like avoiding sushi, coffee, and alcohol. She found many of the entrenched pregnancy “rules” were actually misguided or wrong because they were based on statistics that were either outdated or just plain skewed. Oster turned her findings into Expecting Better: Why the Conventional Pregnancy Wisdom Is Wrong - and What You Really Need to Know.
Her book empowers expecting mothers to make data-driven choices during their pregnancies so they can actually relax and enjoy the process. For example, I found the most helpful breakdown of data was related to breastfeeding and whether it’s truly superior to formula feeding your baby. You should read her book for all of the specific details, but what it boils down to is that there is NO difference in a breastfed versus formula-fed baby’s temperament or IQ. She deduced that formula-fed babies may have more diarrhea, eczema, and possible ear infections.
In a time when there is so much pressure to be a “supermom” and ‘do it all’ (exclusively breastfeed, while bouncing back after baby, and navigating the return to work), I found the results liberating. It helped me make an informed decision based on what worked best for my baby and me, which is why it earned a spot on my list of the best books for first-time moms.
I’d like to believe Emily and I would be best friends in real life. She’s direct, transparent, and shows heart throughout her book. I also love Oster’s writing style because it is practically a turn-on to read a baby book by an author who is willing to state an opinion and provide answers.
Her other books are also great reads for parents. CribSheet focuses on the infant and toddler stages and devotes an entire chapter to sleep training methods, while Family Firm looks at how to define family values early on in your journey and how to approach making decisions as parents. It earned a well-deserved spot on my list of the 10 Best Books For First-Time Dads, and I’m sure new moms would enjoy it as well.
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2. Best Books For First-Time Moms: The Fifth Trimester By Lauren Smith Brody
Lauren Smith Brody masters the art of HOW to return to work after a baby, going over everything from the best way to ask your boss for more flex time to what insight military science can provide about working through sleep deprivation. She’s logical, honest, and all about women supporting women (in and out of the workplace).
“I'd never disliked work... But the thought of leaving my baby killed me,” she writes in the book’s intro. “How could I trust this nanny I'd just hired? How could I possibly pump enough milk to feed my child? How would I not make an idiot of myself on the job running on only four hours of sleep a night?” Throughout the book, she dives into the answers to those questions and more. In addition to her own experience, Brody interviewed over 700 working moms from various fields for the book.
The Fifth Trimester was written before remote work became more commonplace, but it has all the nuts and bolts for the extremely important conversations that you need to have with yourself, your partner, and your employer. This is one of the best books for first-time moms planning to return to the office.
Brody also co-founded the Chamber of Mothers, which advocates for national policies that support mothers, and I encourage anyone who can to contribute $100 to their efforts to lobby for better and more accessible childcare for all.
3. Best Books For First-Time Moms: The Power Pause By Neha Ruch
While Lauren Smith Brody tackles going back to work after having a baby, Neha Ruch’s The Power Pause is set to be an absolute must for any new mom thinking of taking a career pause to stay home with their baby for an extended period.
Her book is slated to publish on January 14, 2025, but her online community, Mother Untitled, is already a top resource for women taking a pause or rethinking their career path post-kids. Ruch has created space for ambitious women to take pride in staying home, and feel more confident and secure with their decision to pause their career — not end it.
Ruch’s upcoming book is described as a mix of expert advice and personal stories of stay-at-home moms who “buck the stereotype.” I was able to preview part of the book, and one of my favorite parts is how she provides actionable solutions to the "What do you do?" question. I found that to be the most grating question when I took a career pause, and her Mad Libs-style responses are brilliant!
Ruch is also passionate about removing the guilt over hiring help at home, regardless of whether you stay at home or are a working parent. She is constantly reminding all of us that it’s okay to want help in motherhood.
“You can be grateful, and still be tired, need a break, want to vent, and deserve help,” she wrote on her Instagram, which I highly recommend any mother follow.
4. Best Books For First-Time Moms: Fair Play By Eve Rodsky
Eve Rodsky is a genius. She found a way to gamify the tasks of parenthood. Her goal is to get both partners at the table and to share more responsibility in the home — not equally, but equitably. The earlier you have these conversations with your partner, the better. Fair Play goes through four rules, 100 household tasks, and various conversation starters to help you and your partner decide who should take the lead on which household chore.
Ellie Windle, founder of household management app Persist, says this book is her number-one recommendation for first-time moms and dads. “I think getting on the same page about TIME is so important,” Windle says. “In most hetero relationships, a huge amount of the work is going to default to the new mother, without a discussion. Being proactive about how you plan to share the load makes a huge difference.”
Thanks in part to Rodsky's book, a new conversation has started amongst women about the fact that we don't want to be the only person able to notice, initiate, and follow through on a household or child-related task. In order to get our partners to carry more of the load, these conversations have to be had, and Fair Play helps you and your partner have these talks in an approachable and productive way.
For example, Rodsky does an excellent job of outlining how to have a conversation with your partner about visible labor — ie) cooking dinner — vs. invisible labor — ie) anticipating and planning meals — in your household. She’s all about giving visibility to tasks that often go unnoticed. As she writes, “visibility = value.”
If reading the book inspires you and your partner to divvy up the Fair Play cards, you must check out our article Fair Play Cards, Made Doable: What To Delegate When You’re Carrying Too Much. We walk through 5 example cards and show how you can delegate parts of your card, while still owning the task — it's essential for busy parents who are juggling too many things.
5. Best Books For First-Time Moms: I Know How She Does It By Laura Vanderkam
Laura Vanderkam explains how success-driven women “do it all” in her book I Know How She Does It. A data-driven time management expert, she collected hour-by-hour time logs from women who make at least $100,000 a year, and then analyzed the results. One takeaway that stood out to me is the importance of quality over quantity when it comes to family time.
She writes: “There were huge financial upsides to leaning back into her career. She could help her family more by billing time at a lawyer's rate than by spending that same quantity of time running errands someone else could do…it simply required focusing on what she did best and not the myriad other things that could occupy her time.”
I love this message because culture tells us that time will fly by (so don’t blink or you’ll miss it!), which makes us worry that we really will miss the joys of motherhood and feel a sense of guilt if we choose to go back to work or pursue our own passions. But we are allowed to develop a strong sense of self and pursue our dreams in tandem with raising our kids. You may have the time to help in the classroom and be a room mom, but that doesn’t mean you have to.
Laura Vanderkam reminds us that you get to choose how you spend your time and provides actionable solutions for working moms to follow to make time for the things that matter most to them.
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6. Best Books For First-Time Moms: When Women Were Dragons By Kelly Barnhill
A fiction book about women spontaneously turning into dragons might not be what you were expecting to see on this list of the best books for first-time moms. But this book was nominated for our list by Hitha Palepu, a pharma CEO, mom, time-saving expert, and avid reader.
“This weird, wonderful book is one of my favorites that I've read this year, and I only wish it had been published when I was expecting my sons or in that postpartum haze,” says Palepu.
When Women Were Dragons takes place in 1955, when suddenly hundreds of wives and moms turn into dragons, cause destruction, and take to the skies. It’s described as a “fiery feminist fantasy tale” and explores rage, female empowerment, and ideas about a woman’s place in society. I’m sure many first-time moms will appreciate diving into this fictional world that explores real-life themes.
“It's refreshing to read about maternal rage and processing it versus suppressing it,” says Palepu.
I believe mom rage is driven by the lack of control we have over our time. As a new mom, you’re expected to be available physically and emotionally at any time for your children. And when you are unable to share the demands of parenting and have open conversations with your partner about the help you need, then it becomes a burden, resentment creeps in, and complete parental burnout is around the corner. That’s honestly enough to make any of us turn into a fire-breathing dragon.
7. Best Books For First-Time Moms: Bringing up Bebe By Pamela Druckerman
Pamela Druckerman is an American journalist who had a baby while living in Paris and began to notice differences in the parenting styles — and outcomes — between French and American parents. For example, she noticed that the French children she knew would sleep through the night at two or three months old, while the children of her American friends would take a year or more to reach that milestone.
“The French seem to have a whole different framework for raising kids,” she writes in the book’s intro. She spent three years researching this book to understand where exactly the differences come from and to provide a deep dive into French parenting and what she thinks American parents can learn from their approach.
Druckerman is idol material for me. Her description of the freedom and independence enjoyed by French moms appeals to every part of my brain, body, and heart, which is why this book earned a spot on my list of the best books for first time moms.
The most groundbreaking for me was the introduction of a mindset to prioritize your relationship with your partner, especially time spent together as people, not just parents, from the get-go. The French believe that “the couple is the most important. It’s the only thing that you choose in your life. Your children, you didn’t choose. You chose your husband. So, you’re going to make your life with him. So if you have an interest in it going well, especially when the children leave, you want to get along with him,” Druckerman writes in Bringing Up Bebe.
Because of Druckerman’s reminder of the importance of the coupledom, we decided to book our nanny to come twice a week at 6 am so that we had one weekday and one weekend day to sleep in together and do whatever we wanted during that time. To this day, it’s one of the best gifts we’ve given ourselves.
8. Best Books For First-Time Moms: It’s Not About The Wine By Celeste Yvonne
Celeste Yvonne talks about the mommy wine culture that looms in our lives (consciously or not). “Anyone who’s been on social media in the last ten years has seen the memes: ‘Mommy needs wine.’ ‘I wine because my kids whine.’ You can buy infant onesies that say, ‘I’m the reason mommy drinks’ on Amazon,” Yvonne writes.
In her book, It's Not About The Wine, she shares her own story about falling into a pattern of becoming a heavy drinker and her journey to becoming sober. She looks at the factors causing the mommy wine culture, and provides tips on how moms can break away from relying on alcohol to cope.
“Wine is just the undertone of something far more nefarious and disturbing: a cultural crush from the pressures of the mental load of motherhood, the increase in mothers returning to the workforce without appropriate support systems, and the societal expectations to do it all ourselves (and make it look easy),” Yvonne writes.
The more aware you are of this very real threat to your experience as a new parent, the better chances you will enjoy more quality time at home without blurring it all out. This book is a great read for anyone who wants to reevaluate their relationship with alcohol or just be more aware of what threats exist in motherhood, outside of the lack of sleep and control of your time.
If you are ever truly interested in taking a break from drinking, then I highly suggest This Naked Mind by Annie Grace. I’ve yet to meet someone who took the time to read it who hasn’t changed their relationship with alcohol for the better.
9. Best Books For First-Time Moms: Mama Needs a Minute! By Mary Catherine Starr
This book doesn’t come out until March 11, 2025, but I just had to include it on this list of the best books for first time moms because I’m excited about its release. If you don’t already, you should follow author and artist Mary Catherine Starr on Instagram. She creates comics about “motherhood, marriage, double standards, + mental load.”
Her comics and upcoming book, Mama Needs A Minute, are meant to add levity, while also providing a reality check on what motherhood is really like. Among other things, Starr looks at the deeper emotional trauma that our bodies and brains experience as we transition into being mothers and face a world that still expects us to look good while ‘doing it all’.
Sh!t No One Tells You is another humorous oldie but goodie that's also a fun read for first-time moms.
10. Best Books For First-Time Moms: Motherkind By Zoe Blaskey
Author Zoe Blaskey told The Times that when she first became a mom she was in shock about how it impacted her emotionally and physically.
“I went to all the right classes but I was completely clueless about what would happen to me,” she told the Times. “This is where the ‘bounce-back’ message for mothers becomes so toxic. It used to be physical — ‘you’ll bounce back into your old jeans’ — but now it also means that you’ll slip back into your work, friendships, your old life as if nothing has happened. That’s impossible and it really damages mothers to make them try.”
Blaskey says that at that time one thing that helped her cope was listening to podcasts and reading books about the psychology and physiology of women after giving birth. That led her to eventually start her podcast, Motherkind, which quickly became popular, reaching more than 5 million downloads.
Now, Blaskey has compiled all those years of research, insight from her podcast guests, and personal stories from the Motherkind community into her book. Motherkind aims to help moms “ride the emotional rollercoaster of motherhood.” Each chapter includes self-coaching questions and tools to help you implement the different concepts into your life.
